Deeper Passion through Daoist Shapeshifting!

This is a blog post about intimacy, but first we're gonna talk about Kung Fu!

I was very fortunate that my master taught us the legendary 'Preying Mantis' Kung Fu.  This Chinese martial arts system emulates the movements and "spirit" of an animal, as such, it contains many Daoist teachings on psychological "shapeshifting".

Two lessons stand out to me as most important.  The first was that no one was allowed to study the mantis Kung Fu without having some degree of mastery in qigong or other parts of the Shaolin curriculum, and the second was how to turn on and also turn off the mindset of the mantis.

The reason for both of these is the same: the mantis symbolizes total ruthlessness and aggression.  Sifu taught us that the other Kung Fu animals have some version of compassion, but the mantis mindset is that of the ultimate predator.  

Why would a spiritual martial art system train in this kind of predatory energy?  Because sometimes that ruthlessness is needed in order to defend what is precious or even achieve our goals in spite of obstacles. 

This is where the two important teachings come in:  You don't study before you've got grounding in the self-regulatory methods of qigong, or the yogic forms of Shaolin.  These give you a foundation of centeredness, calm, and compassion that you can return too - rather than be swept up by the aggressiveness of the training session.

For the second teaching, Sifu would have us visualize the spirit of the mantis leaving our body like steam or mist at the end of the training session, and coming to sit on our shoulder like a spiritual guardian.  This helped us to delineate the energy we'd use in training for situations where someones life might be in danger, versus returning to our state of centered compassion from which we'd live the rest of our lives.  

I share these stories here related to intimacy because of the upcoming workshop 'Daoist Sensual Shapeshifting' on Saturday, 9/23.  These teachings apply not just to this unique, niche Kung Fu style, but to our whole lives.  We need to learn to "shapeshift" from one state to another so that we can show up as the best version of ourselves for that situation. 

All too often in long-term relationships, intimacy erodes because we can't make the switch from our workaday self - busy answering emails, or taking care of the kids - to a lover who can open with a partner in bliss.  

In relationships where intimacy hasn't waned, we can still miss out on exploring what's truly possible because the human psyche tends to travel in ruts of what is "normal".  Don't get me wrong, staying with what you know works can produce plenty of lovemaking that is comfortable and nourishing - but many of us also want to find out what other adventures could be on the menu!

Some mystics have taught that how you are with your lover is how you'll be with all of life. 

In this Daoist way of thinking, the spiritual lessons of intimacy are a training ground for skills that we will bring to every facet of our experience.  We need to be able to put on the different "animals" within to get a fierce workout in the gym, comfort those who are grieving, set boundaries with those who'd push them, and all the other diverse gymnastics our psyches must perform each day.  By training in the art of transformation, this shapeshifting becomes second nature to us.

Our psyches become flexible and we identify with the open and compassion spacious within rather than any rigid persona.  Then we can adopt whatever form best serves the living moment from this more spacious identity.

I hope you can make it to our training coming up on Saturday the 23rd where we'll explore many traditional methods of psychological shapeshifting, and specifically apply them through the Daoist teachings on holistic loving and intimacy.